Dogs

dogs awyee

A while back I went to Tompkins Square Park with my girl for the annual Halloween dog parade.  We both have dogs that currently live at our respective childhood homes with our respective parents–they behave.  I guess you could say we needed a doggie fix, although I usually don’t like using those words in close proximity. I feel bad for my dog–she didn’t need her ovaries ripped out, nor did my girlfriend’s dog need his balls chopped. But that’s the norm thanks to Bob Barker.

Here are the pictures I snapped up.

 

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This was by far the best costume. For a while the woman with her back fat stuck in her bra was ruining every photo op.  There was a man in the moon costume that shuffled along the side of Elliott and E.T.

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Who gives a shit about babies

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This lil’ princess was the first cutie we ran up on. The costume and breed may look dainty, but this bich was fiery. She owned it. (8.0/10)

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This dog wouldn’t turn around. Asshole.

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Probably the most fitting breed for this costume. This doggie was chillllllllllllllllllll. Let everyone pet him. He also didn’t smell like shit.

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Dogs immitate humans. Humans immitate dogs. Either way there is waaay too much butt sniffing when any species wears these costumes.

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Pedophile

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“I’m soo cute. Look at me–in my braids–white teeth–head tilt.” Nobody cares, bro. Get off the dog and walk away. Go play with your dolls or fall off a seesaw. Just get out of my photo.

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Typical dog on dog.

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Alright, here it is. This guy was insanely cute. Teddy bear eyes, floppy ears, weakest little bark. My heart melts just reminiscing. If only I stole him.

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Justin Bieber as a fat pug. The owner didn’t really need to dress him up in a purple sweatshirt, or give him a shitty wig to get the point across–all he needed to do was lift his little body up, show the world his vacant scrotum and we all would have gotten the joke.

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Spoiled bich

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Definitely high on the cute factor–even though I hate bees. I once shot a bee in half with an air-soft gun. Probably the coolest thing I did in my prepubescent years. I would never do that to this little guy.

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Mummy dog was cooOOool. He really owned it! He walked with the stiffness of my **** at a playground.

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